Clients often express that they want to be happier. Finding happiness is a goal for many. Happiness can be influenced by how we feel about ourselves, our emotions and our relationships with others. It is a state of being and you have the power to create it for yourself. Deciding to be happier is the first step.

Fifteen simple and helpful tips that can help you achieve your goal.

  1. Learn to like and love yourself- Try focusing on your strengths. Be mindful of the compliments you receive and take note as they are reminders of your strengths. It is important for you to realize your capabilities but it is validating when someone else recognizes them. Keep in mind that no one is perfect and accept yourself for who you are.
  2. Gratitude- Shift your focus. Concentrate on the things you have rather then what you don’t have. Gratitude and appreciation will increase your chances of being happier. Gratitude is truly the best attitude to have!
  3. Forgiveness- You can choose to have a relationship or not to have a relationship with someone you feel wronged you. But don’t hold onto the grudge. For yourself and your happiness, it is sometimes best to let it go.
  4. Don’t believe the negative thoughts- Start everyday with some positive thoughts and revisit those thoughts throughout the day. If negativity starts entering your mind try not to dwell on it. Find some positive quotes that have meaning for you and try saying them.
  5. Friends and Family- Spending some quality time on your relationships is a great investment for you and the people in your life.
  6. Meaningful activities- Spend some time helping others. By volunteering you can do something you like to do and make a difference in someone’s life and/or the community.
  7. Simplify your life- Try not to fill your plate to high. Limit the tasks and responsibilities you agree to do. It is ok to say no.
  8. Relax- Take some time out of your busy day and relax for a few moments. Sit on the couch, read a good book, call a friend, find something that helps you relax.
  9. Don’t sweat the small stuff- Try limiting your “worry” thoughts. Figure out what is a real problem and what is just an annoying nuisance. Make a plan and take things step by step.
  10. Enjoy nature and what life has to offer- Take a few moments and stare at the clouds, stop and smell the flowers, watch the sunset, or wait until evening and look at the stars.
  11. Do things you enjoy- Take a vacation, go out to dinner, see an entertaining movie. Whatever interests you, make time for it as that is making time for yourself.
  12. Exercise- Find an activity that gets you moving and releases some of your stress. Exercise releases endorphins in your body and that will make you feel good. So make time for an enjoyable physical activity as the benefits will be rewarding.
  13. Be open to change- Sometimes changing the way you think about something is all that is needed. Be more aware and open to making positive changes in your daily life.
  14. Imagine your best- Don’t let fear guide you. Look at what you really want and see yourself getting it. Imagining what you want is a big part of achieving it.
  15. Enjoy the simple pleasures in life- Smile, laugh, dance, sing and have fun!


Happiness is achievable for everyone. It is determined more by our minds then our circumstances. Understanding what works for you will help you find the happiness that you thought was just out of your reach.

If you find yourself always searching, then please try these tips. If you feel that you need more and you would like some counseling, contact me and let’s talk about setting up an appointment.

Your Relationship Expert,